Living the Yes, Gratefully

To the maker of the feast,

To the power of loaf and yeast,

Till the bread and broth doth cease,

Gratefulness is joy! 

Calvin Miller, Guardians of the Singreale

I am discovering that Eucharisteo--thankfulness--is the key to intuitive eating.

Not a list of don'ts, or can't-haves, just gratefulness for every little bite, every little blessing. Who knew?

The more we pile on the rules, the tips, the guidelines...the more the focus is taken off our living, flowing, constantly communicated relationship with God. When we are in constant connection--constant communion (there's that Eucharist again)--with Him, we naturally eat in moderation unencumbered by rules laws and fear and deprivation.

Us, His children, sitting in His lap. There is no deprivation, only perfect provision.

It breaks my heart seeing my sisters all over the world so caught up in their diets, their programs, their how-to guides, trying desperately to get it all right, never transgress, fight their way back when they fall off the wagon.

The lips know only shallow tunes.

The heart is where great symphonies are born.

Calvin Miller 

Why can't we just live in his lap and joy in His gifts and let gratefulness be our song to His heart, our very heartbeat? Can we not live the yes in this, as in every other area of our lives?

"For the kingdom of God is not a matter of eating and drinking, 

but of righteousness, peace and joy in the Holy Spirit, 

because anyone who serves Christ in this way 

is pleasing to God and receives human approval." 

Romans 14:17-18

In the Groove

The moments are coming a little more often now, the ones where I feel like I might be finding a groove with this intuitive eating thing. Been back at it for a week now, and it feels pretty good.

The temptation to overeat (meaning eat more than half a cup of food at a time) really only comes when I ignore hunger signals and go longer than I should without eating anything. Even then, once I eat five or six bites, my brain kicks in and says to stop. I'm doing a decent job of listening, but I know to watch out for the signs and heed them so I'm not in that spot too often.

I've been thinking a lot lately about my personal philosophy, as it were, regarding this whole intuitive eating according to God's design thing. What I've discovered and had confirmed over and over is that I don't believe any food is to be deemed sinful while other foods are deemed righteous.

Fried foods are not in the doghouse.
Sweets are not out the window.
Candy is fine when I'm really craving it.

Everything in moderation.

Everything God created is good, and while I understand that different preparation methods may produce different results (obviously, or why bother?), if it's all eaten in moderation, there is no issue.

I find that when I am truly able to intuit what my body is asking for, very often it will ask for steamed veggies, or sauteed lean meat. So I pay attention to it, whatever "it" might be. That way, when I am truly craving chocolate, I know there's a reason for it and I eat chocolate.

It's all good. It really is.

I'm not going to call anything He made unholy. I'm just going to eat within sensible limits attuned to what my body is asking for, and leave the rest up to Him.

I can trust Him with this.

Less is More

I was just thinking about how little food I actually need to meet the daily need. I have plenty of stored fluff to pull from, so apparently I don't need too much right now. When I think back a few months to when I got back on track with the intentional eating, I was eating a small fraction of what I had been eating in a day, and even that wasn't anywhere near what the average intake seems to be.

Today I had 2 cinnamon rolls (a few hours apart) and about a cup of fried potatoes with egg, onion, cheese, and bacon. That's all I've needed, and I feel neither full nor hungry, just comfortable. I hate feeling full. Honestly, I prefer emptiness to fullness if I had to choose one.

I find I really like being out of the habit of overeating. I'm drinking mostly fresh-squeezed lemonade lately, so I haven't been drinking much soda at all (or really much of anything else). The lemon is very healthy, so I feel good about drinking it. And it certainly tastes great! Steve has been squeezing the lemons with our electric juicer.

I'm not sure if I mentioned this or not, but one of the steps toward better health we have taken as a family this week was getting rid of our microwave. Yep, it's gone. Read some studies on the effects of radiation on food, people, and what eating microwaved food does to those who consume it. Yeah, not liking that. So out it went.

Overall, I'm feeling pretty good about finding more ways to simplify, cut down, focus in. It feels very much like a step in the right direction.

Mentality of Excess

Our society is plagued with a mentality of excess. Bigger is better. More is better. Not only is this misleading, it's downright dangerous.

Look what super-sizing has done to our country. Obesity rates are at an all-time high. Greed and gluttony make great bedfellows, and Americans are jumping (waddling?) on the bandwagon in droves, like very fluffy sheep to the slaughter--a slaughter in the form of life-altering and life-threatening illnesses brought on by such unhealthy eating habits.

This seems bizarre to me. I can't eat a whole sandwich in one sitting (without feeling stuffed), let alone a super-sized meal with a sandwich, jumbo fry, and half-gallon-sized drink. Where do people put all that food and drink?

If our stomachs are supposed to be the size of our fists, no wonder we are overweight! And food-related industries all over are more than happy to keep piling it on (in) and raking in the money while we simultaneously pad the bankrolls of the medical profession and the pharmaceutical companies. And keep the funeral directors' schedules packed.

I can't help thinking, What a destructive cycle for the temple of God.

I know for me it takes complete mental restructuring to get an accurate view of this whole picture. And it's coming, slowly but surely. It's taking a lot of prayer, a lot of fleshing it all out in words as I write it all down to see what I think and what I'm learning.

It's good to stay teachable.

Starting Again

Intentionality has not been my strong suit over the past couple of months.

I've been doing a lot of thinking, but not a lot of acting on those thoughts. But slowly God has been working on some things in me, and I think some sort of plan may be taking shape.

One of the main things I feel like I'm being nudged to do is to read Lysa TerKeurst's Made to Crave. I plan to buy it next weekend from Sam's Club. I've picked it up several times to peruse it, but haven't listened to the little voice telling me to buy it, take it home, read it, practice it, make it part of my fabric. I've been nervous about it, mostly out of just plain reticence to follow through with obedience.

I had a really bad day emotionally yesterday, and as a result I hardly ate anything at all (maybe half a cup of BLT in a bowl and a few bites of pie all day). I noticed (duh) how much better I felt (particularly my tummy), which gave me a bit of an impetus (because plain old obedience didn't kick in first, but it's coming) to carry the intentional eating into today, only a few bites at a time when I'm truly hungry. It's amazing how much healthier I feel.

There are moments when I wonder if I'm putting too much spiritual emphasis on this whole thing, and moments when I wonder if it's enough. I think I will be better able to answer that after reading Lysa's book. Meanwhile, I would like to do my best to reestablish healthy eating habits.

I'm already off to a decent start. Steve put the spaghetti on my plate tonight--too much for me for one moderate meal. I left half of it there.

And so I prayerfully move forward, eyes on Him, trusting Him to help me back onto the right path.

The one where I'm walking beside Him and aware of His presence, His filling, my hunger for Him.

Food will never fulfill the craving for more and more of Him.

109: Floating

I've been working to get fully back to the intentional, purposeful, simple eating habits I had established before the holidays. I'm not quite back to that yet, but oddly enough I haven't gained any of the weight back. I guess that means I've at least maintained. I know I haven't eaten a lot, but it's been more than I was eating before the holidays, which (duh) is why I was losing.

So anyway, I'm working on getting back to the 0-5 intentional eating pattern that had me slimming down. The weather has been beautiful, so I really should get out and play some basketball on my hoop I got for Christmas.

95: Hanging In There

I've been holding my own pretty well through the holidays. I haven't seriously overeaten, although I've probably gone to a 5 instead of sticking closer to 3. I've recently gone back to more intentional eating again. With the holidays behind me that should be a little easier. I actually did better over the holidays than I was expecting. I ate to fullness rather than staying beneath that, but thankfully I didn't stuff myself like I have in the past at such special feasts.

I'd like to get back to being more regular about writing here, too. That alone helps with accountability, and communication is always a good thing in my way of thinking. The smaller clothing my friend is sending me from out west should be here any day. I'm pretty excited about that. More motivation to stay intuitive and intentional and keep naturally trimming down.